M is for Missed Miscarriage

My birth was awful, I have been told on several occasions, and left my mother with a very large scar that I made on my grand entrance.

I had a prolapsed cord (my umbilical cord bent and fell out) not nice! Especially for my dear mum.

Everybody else seems to fall pregnant when you want to. However, I know people who have waited a lot longer than I did, so I mustn’t complain.
During my first pregnancy I was so ill, my OCD was at it’s worse for years. I had to leave my job as I just wasn’t coping. (My dream job as a support worker).
But, finally, it was my 12 week scan. My lovely husband had to travel to the other side of the country for his Grandfather’s funeral that same day. My mother-in-law went with me. I have been very blessed, she and I have always got on and I feel lucky to have her.

The events of that scan brought us even closer, that was the only positive outcome of the day.

There just wasn’t a heart beat, the fetus had stopped growing at 7 weeks but my body had kept it. A ‘Missed Miscarriage’ I didn’t even know it could happen.

I have never felt such pain, all that hope and excitement gone. I know it was so early and these things happen for a reason. I wouldn’t have my monkey, but it still hurts.
Then I had to tell my Dan, over the phone, the words didn’t come easy.

Then a day later I had an ‘evacuation of the womb’. A man must have named that for sure! What a lovely name.

I was lucky to be surrounded by amazing family and friends, the support we got was a blessing.

It’s strange how it’s not until you go through something like that, that people start to tell you their experiences of a miscarriage. It’s so important that we are more open, I know it could happen again but we just try to enjoy the pregnancy until what happens happens. I still feel scared, today is my 12 week scan for hopefully my second child and the nerves are there.Our new baby due in August 2016 and is doing well.

hello baby


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